Faith and health...revisited

A new year.

A new me?

Nah. The same old me, just hopefully new packaging.

A better me?

Most definately.

In 2006, with the help of diet and exersize, I dropped alot of weight. I was healthy. I was comfortable in my own skin, AND my own clothes!! When I got pregnant with James that all went by the wayside. I've gained it back, every last pound.

In 2006, though I was thousands of miles from my family, for the first time in my adult life I was spriritually healthy. I became a member of a church back in Goose Creek, SC. I loved it there. I sang in the choir and cried when I sang The Old Rugged Cross. It felt like home. We moved back to Washington and I didn't go to church for nearly 2 years.

In 2006, if you'd ask me to tell you a little bit about myself, I probably would have told you about my family, my love of horses and the stable where I took riding lessons. I'd have mentioned my monthly bunko night, my Avon business and maybe even my obsession with Diet Rockstar energy drink. Today, if you asked me, I'd say "proud wife and mommy of 2 beautiful children". That's not to say I'm not proud of my children, that's not to say there's anything WRONG with such an answer. But to put it in perspective, where did I go? What happened to my likes? My interests? Where did I go? And who am I again?

I'll tell you who I am.

I'm a woman. An unhealthy woman. A woman with more love for her family than one could ever imagine...but love for herself? Lacking. I don't love myself. I like myself - but I don't love myself. I take care of my children. I take care of the families onboard USS Abraham Lincoln. I take care of my husband, when he's actually home. But somewhere in there, I have forgotten me. I haven't been taking care of me. It's almost as if I have just been refusing to nurture myself. I've been putting garbage into my body, and my soul has been left starving by my neglect. I'm not proud of that, but I'm glad I can recognize and acknowledge it.

The common thread of the "healthy" me was the year 2006. It just so happens that on January 1st of 2006, I dubbed it "The year of health and faith". I exersized. I went to weight watchers. I discovered that I had personal interestss, and I followed them! It all worked! I was in desperate need of change - and I did it! Deja Vu anyone? And so...here we are. Health and faith - reprioritized in order of importance. 2010, the year of Faith and Health...revisited.

Here's to me.